More Than Habits
Grow or Die is a lot about doing.
Set a priority.
Build the habit.
Complete the challenge.
Hit the goal.
I genuinely love that.
But I've learned something over the years:
If you focus only on doing, eventually you'll quit.
The vision of Grow or Die is healthy, sustainable growth for every leader.
I care about this more than most people realize.
I've watched people with incredible potential slowly drift away from the person they wanted to become.
I've watched people become someone they never intended to become.
The longer I live, the more convinced I become that sustainable growth is built on who you're becoming, not just what you're doing.
That's why I care so much about helping people think in decades, not days.
Thinking that way is difficult.
Honestly, it's inconvenient.
It forces you to think beyond what you feel today, what you want today, and what is easiest today.
I ask myself 3 questions every day.
Who am I?
Who am I becoming?
Who do I want to be?
Some people think it’s overkill.
Here's a common response I get:
"You're doing too much, just live your life."
But that's exactly the problem.
If I just live my life, life will take me somewhere.
The question is where.
Nobody drifts toward becoming a better leader.
Nobody accidentally builds character.
Nobody wakes up twenty years later and discovers they became the person they always hoped to be.
Growth is intentional.
And it never stops being intentional.
Years ago, I realized how shallow many of my thoughts, interactions, and actions were.
I wasn't becoming the leader I wanted to be.
I wasn't showing up with the intentionality, awareness, and consistency I thought I had.
That realization bothered me.
Because I knew if I kept living that way, I would eventually become someone I never intended to become.
So I started getting intentional.
I became more intentional about what I thought about.
More intentional about the conversations I had.
More intentional about the actions I took every day.
I knew the type of man and leader I wanted to become.
And I knew that person would never appear by accident.
I had to become him one decision at a time.
The doing mattered.
But the being came first.
To be honest, the habits were never the goal.
The person I was becoming was the goal.
So yes, I still ask myself those questions every day.
Who am I?
Who am I becoming?
Who do I want to be?
Those questions remind me what matters.
They remind me where I'm headed.
They give direction to my habits when I don't feel motivated.
Some days I don't feel like doing the work.
But when I know who I want to be, the decision becomes much clearer.
I've been building habits intentionally for over a decade.
One thing I've learned is that you never graduate from intentionality.
People act like once you've been consistent long enough, you can put growth on autopilot.
I don't believe that.
I've seen how quickly drift can happen.
A decade of intentional growth can start unraveling faster than most people realize.
That's why I keep coming back to those questions.
Growth is not just about doing the stuff.
It's about becoming the person.
Yes, the priorities matter.
The habits matter.
The challenges matter.
The goals matter.
But all of those things should be pointing somewhere.
They should be shaping someone.
And that someone is YOU.
If you want to grow for the rest of your life, you need more than a system.
You need a vision for who you want to be.
When you know who you want to become, growth becomes more than a chore.
It becomes a commitment.
This isn't an overnight thing.
It's something you choose to commit to.
And then you keep making that choice over and over again.
That's what I've tried to do and help others do as well.
And it's why I still ask myself:
Who am I?
Who am I becoming?
Who do I want to be? 💯